


I Think I Lost My Heart

by shotforthesky



Series: Malec Prompts [3]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, I'm so sorry I'm going to hell, M/M, Two deaths, um everything hurts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-15
Updated: 2017-08-15
Packaged: 2018-12-15 20:09:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11813322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shotforthesky/pseuds/shotforthesky
Summary: Prompt #3: 2x20 AU where Clary doesn't stop Valentine in time and Raziel grants his wish to kill all Downworlders. Magnus is at Lake Lynn with Alec and Izzy because he refused to leave them, and now there's nothing Alec can do to save him.





	I Think I Lost My Heart

**Author's Note:**

> I have a prompt for you to consider: 2x20 AU where Clary doesn't stop Valentine in time and Raziel grants his wish to kill all Downworlders. Magnus is at Lake Lynn with Alec and Izzy because he refused to leave them, and now there's nothing Alec can do to save him.
> 
> Okay so I hated writing this and my friend begged me not to but I did it anyway and I feel like the devil.  
> 2x20 killed me and it was one of the best things I've ever seen in my life. Title is from Hands Tied by Billy Lockett because that's what I was listening to when this happened.  
> Read on [tumblr](http://shotfortheskyy.tumblr.com/post/164225433614/i-think-i-lost-my-heart)  
> All mistakes are mine (aka this entire fic) and I own nothing

When the portal opened to Lake Lynn, Magnus could feel his heart sink in his chest. They were too late. Raziel had risen.

  
“We’re too late,” Izzy gasped, voicing Magnus’ thought, face glowing in the orange light.  
Magnus placed his hand on Izzy’s shoulder, eyes widened in disbelief. “He raised the angel.”

  
Alec turned to Magnus, worry flickering on his face. “Magnus, you need to get to safety.”  
Magnus shook his head, ignoring Alec’s concerns. “We need to find Jace and Clary,” he said before taking off towards Lake Lynn, heart in his throat.

  
“Valentine’s succeeded in raising Raziel, Magnus. He can kill everyone in the entire Downworld! You have to get to the Seelie Realm, you have to get to safety,” Alec pleaded from behind him, his breath shaky as they continued to run.

  
Alec was afraid, maybe as much as he was.

  
“I’m not leaving, this is bigger than me,” he shouted back.

  
Alec let out a noise and Magnus knew if he turned around, he would see the fear and disapproval on Alec’s face. If he looked at Alec, he knew he wouldn’t be able to continue. The fear would control him. He continued forward, leading the Lightwoods towards the lake, towards Raziel.

  
“Magnus, maybe you should go, before Valentine can do anything.” It was Izzy this time. She was moving at his side, hair whipping around her face.

  
“Don’t make me tell you two again. We have to get to him before it’s too late, I don’t care what it takes.”

  
Izzy and Alec shared a look. They ran in silence, knowing full and well that Magnus wasn’t going to budge.

  
When they burst out of the foliage, onto the lake’s shore, no one knew where to look. Jace was on the ground, blood covering his chest, dead. Magnus could hear the falter in Alec’s breathing, the choke of a sob leaving his mouth as he saw his Parabatai’s body. Clary was next to him, hands shackled, bruises and cuts covering her face, as well as tears. Valentine was standing in the water, knife in his hand, coming up to slice through his hand and spill his blood.

  
“Raziel!” Valentine shouted, “Grant my wish!”

  
With a flash of angelic light, Raziel disappeared, leaving silence in his wake. Alec was quick to move, one of his arrows sinking into Valentine’s chest and another into his neck.

  
“Did Valentine-” Izzy was cut short by Magnus, his magic emanating from his body.

  
His hands flew up to his chest as he felt his heart pounding, squeezing in his chest. He looked up, his eyes locking on Alec who was too busy freeing Clary to notice the drastic change.

  
“Magnus!” Izzy shouted, her hands coming up to his shoulders, trying to support him.  
Alec’s attention snapped away from Clary as he was on his feet in a matter of seconds.

  
“Oh my god, oh my god, no! _No!_ Magnus! Magnus, please-oh god-don't, _please_.”

  
Magnus was gasping in pain, crumpling to the ground. His legs weren't strong enough to hold him up and the pain in his chest was too much. Alec’s cries rang in his ears as he watched the shadowhunter run towards him, arms wrapping around him and pulling him into his chest.

  
“Alexander,” he whispered, eyes filling with tears.

  
This was it, Valentine had won. He was going to die, he _was_ dying. And with him, the entire Downworld that wasn't with the Queen.

  
“Don't leave me, please. Magnus. _Magnus_ , I can't live without you! Please don’t make me. Please don't go, not after I just found you, not after you made me-you made me fall in love with you.”

  
Alec’s hands were running through Magnus’ hair, tears coating his cheeks. Alec pressed kisses into his hair, onto his forehead, his cheeks, his lips. Magnus let out a moan of pain as he curled into himself, the agony eating away at him. He cursed the angel, he cursed Valentine, he cursed himself for not heeding Alec and Izzy’s warnings.

  
“I love you, Alexander. And I’m-I’m sorry that I’ve caused you so much pain. You didn’t deserve it,” he gasped, clutching Alec’s hand in his.

  
“What can I do? Izzy, what can I _do?_ Help me, please!”

  
Magnus shook his head and tried to smile at Alec. He felt a tear escape from his eye, running down his cheek and dropping onto Alec’s hand.

  
“Alec, tell-tell me you love me. One last time.”

Alec needed to. He need to say it. He needed that to be the last thing he said. If he didn't say it, he'd regret it forever. Magnus couldn't let that happen.

  
Alec shook his head, tears spilling faster from his eyes, “I love you, I love you, I love you...”

  
Magnus’ hand fell slack in Alec’s and his chest stilled, and so did Alec’s heart.

  
There was no true love’s kiss that would save him. There was no wish from the angel. There was nothing that could save him.

  
So there he sat, Magnus cushioned in Alec’s lap, the only sounds heard were the heartbroken sobs and the lapping of water. Izzy wrapped her arms around her brother, her forehead pressed to his shoulder, her body shaking. She wept for the loss of her brother and her friend.

  
And Alec, he wept for the loss of his parabatai and his love. He’d lost his soulmate and his heart. He would never be whole again. He couldn’t breathe. He was _broken._

**Author's Note:**

> Request stuff in the comments or on [tumblr](http://shotfortheskyy.tumblr.com/)  
> Or just come chat with me


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